Tuesday, September 28, 2010


Oh God, what has happened? I cant control myself. And i feel, lonely. I miss my mom, she knows me better. I need a tight hug from her, to calm me down. I told her everything, and she has been the most understanding woman in this world. I'm not good enough, I'm totally bad. Dont deny it. But yeah, this little bloggie of mine is the 2nd good listener. I mean, at least I have a place to express my feeling. I'm totally SICK OF MY LIFE. I've become WORSE on everybody's eyes. There's no good even when I got A+ in Maths and A- for IT. The most important thing is, I never be good on others' eyes. Yes, this is me. An upset girl with her boring blog, nagging about herself in her own blog. But who cares? There's nobody. I repeat, NOBODY


Yes, I always be at the wrong side. And yeah, youre always right. Well, I'll be fine with this situation. Dh biasa :) Sometimes, it makes me wanna cry. I wish I could stand on the edge of the mountain, I wanna cry and scream loudly. You dont know how much I feel pain inside. Deep inside.. my heart. I'll never talk again, oh boy you've left me speechless. Thats what Lady Gaga said and yes, thats what my heart says. Right now, boy. Right now. Its better for me to be silence. Thats more than GOOD. Its excellent! To be honest, I feel like standing on the mountain and commit suicide. Can I? Oh God, what should I do now? I'm out of control. I wanna cry, seriously. But I feel ashamed, all of my friends are here. And my heart cant bear the disease anymore. I'm afraid if it will burst. And once it burst, there will be no forgiveness. God, help me. Pleaseee :'(

Saturday, September 25, 2010

I like the way it hurts

I'm not feeling well. I'm sick. Headache. Tired. I cried a lot. I've wasted tons of tears. I'm hurt. But you know me very well. No matter how hard I tried to avoid you. No matter how hard I said I hate you. I will always try to reach you. Still care about you. Still need your attention. But once you said SUCKS, I will stop moving. Stop calling. And be alone. Start crying and start worrying about you. Afraid if something happened to you. I just want you to know that, I always care about you. Cause I always love you, and always will be.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Eid Mubarak :)

Hello.  It''s been a week since we, as Muslims celebrated Hari Raya. So an open house has been held at my place on Thursday, 16th Sept 2010 which was a public holiday. It's Malaysia dayy! Yeahh, proud to be Malaysian :D
So Dau, Fika, Muz, Farris and Aziq came to my house. Thanks alott!! I asked them to wear baju raya so that we can take Raya pictures nicely. Haha padannn! :P 
I'm going back to Bangi this Monday, have to wake up very early in the morning, urghh :/  I dont want to go back to the hostel, I hate being there! It's haunted you know? Enough said. No need to write everything about it lah, goosebumps! For the whole 2 weeks holiday, I only meet Dau two times. We're not going for a date. Dau is busy since he had start working. Hmm. I hope we can go out for a date next week, for our 1st anniversary which is on 24th Sept. I really want to celebrate this precious moment, Oh God, I cant believe that we have been through this relationship for almost a year. And yes, it's complicated. Quite complicated! But it's okay, we'll try our best to stick on each other and make this relationship stronger. Amin. I LOVE YOU :)